Toddlers are cute, like ridiculously cute. Starting to loose their baby fat, and yet keeping just enough for plenty of cheek squishing; it’s no wonder I cave to most of my son’s demands!
I was always warned about the Terrible Two’s and how my adorable baby boy will become Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I have come to learn that they were right… Sort of.
I was being warned that the terrible two’s were terrible for me. That it would make me become so frustrated, angry, hopeless and feeling helpless.
I’ve come to the realization that this point in my son’s life is terrible for him.
He knows some words and can even string some into small sentences, but his vocabulary isn’t big enough to tell me what he wants or needs all the time. And that’s what’s terrible. No longer is a pacifier, bottle or boob the answer. He is his own person, with his own wants and desires.
Last night he had a complete meltdown. Totally inconsolable. The reason? I gave him the water he asked for, but he either changed his mind or was confused and meant milk. (Insert tired mom eye roll)
But really, when these kind of meltdowns happen out of the blue, I immediately am searching for blood. I mean his shrieks could be used in movies as a sound bite of someone being murdered… Lord knows what the neighbors must think! And don’t get me started with fits in public places… Sometimes I feel like I have to hold up my hands to everyone and swear I didn’t do it! (Please Officer! I just picked up his stuffed Mickey the wrong way!)
Even so, none of these experiences or feelings are terrible for me. I try to just remind myself that I am an adult, my brain is developed while his is still trying to sort all these feelings out. Throwing fits is the only way he knows how to deal with his toddler stress! (You’d be stressed too if you were surrounded by giants that spoke a different language you couldn’t understand!)
I (try to) stay calm and reassure him that it’s ok and talk to him like a person; asking him what is wrong, telling him to use his words to let me know what he wants or why he is so upset. He may not completely understand me, but being calm is better than the alternative.
Yelling at a toddler who is frustrated and throwing a fit will only make him cry even harder. Been there, done that.
So yeah, I am not perfect, I would never pretend to be. I have gotten just as frustrated as he has and yelled back… Sometimes it’s hard to tell if he is just trying to push my limits by behaving badly, or if he just can’t EVEN!!
It’s a learning process, and will continue to be for at least the next 20 years! So buckle up mommies, it’s gonna be a hell of a ride! 😄
But for now… I am his rock; something he can cling to while trying to get through wave after wave of emotions that, in his whole 2 1/2 years of life, he just hasn’t been able to figure out yet.
For now… I have to be the calm when he can’t be, and afterwards I can look back and laugh about it!
Oh! You wanted the other Pluto sticker that is completely identical to the one I am holding? Um… Ok?
You want to cuddle before nap time? Ok! Wait, my boobs are in your way? I’m sorry, I can’t take my boobs off… Really baby, they don’t come off.
No B, you can’t have my (coffee/beer/whatever). I know it’s frustrating not getting your way… *sips said drink*
Why are you crying? Oh, daddy looked in your direction?! How dare he!
You get the point 😉 Some of the things he freaks out about seem trivial and hilarious to me, but I have a little laugh to myself as I try to remain calm and stoic (laughing when he’s in a mood can be just as bad as yelling back, he is not one to be mocked).
2 1/2 years is not enough time for most of adults to master a skill. Why should I expect my son, who was just a little helpless human for most of his life, to be an expert in understanding and handling his emotions?
Just something that has been on my mind and wanted to share my thoughts 😊 Let me know your thoughts in the comments! Next post will be a makeup post with a special collaboration, make sure you subscribe so you don’t miss it!
“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.” -C.S. Lewis